Thursday, October 30, 2008

From a broken heart...

This is a cross-post from my facebook account. Forgive me for not wanting to re-write everything....

This week has already been a trial for us. For those who didn't know (and please forgive me there are many of you) we found out a few weeks ago that we were pregnant. We were a little shocked as this was not in the "plan" per say, but thrilled none the less.

However, God's plans were different for this little one than ours were. Monday, October 27th, I began to miscarry and God brought our little one home to heaven. I'm not going to lie... it hurts. Especially because this is the second child He's called home before we got to know them.

The hurt will pass, it always does. The memory of what could of been will remain... it always does. I am trying not to ask why... it doesn't do any good. For now , I breathe in and breathe out. Tomorrow is filled with new promises and God is always good, regardless of our circumstances.

We will mourn for our time lost with little Logan...but rejoice that God holds our child, and that Jordan has another playmate in heaven! :)I think this song sums up where my heart is right now:

Praise You in This Stormwords by Mark Hall/music by Mark Hall and Bernie Herms

I was sure by now,God, that You would have reached down and wiped our tears away, stepped in and saved the day. But once again, I say amen and it's still raining as the thunder rolls I barely hear You whisper through the rain, "I'm with you"and as Your mercy falls I raise my hands and praise the God who gives and takes away.

Chorus: And I'll praise you in this storm and I will lift my hands for You are who You are no matter where I am and every tear I've cried You hold in your hand You never left my side and though my heart is torn I will praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind You heard my cry to Youand raised me up again my strength is almost gone how can I carry on if I can't find You and as the thunder rolls I barely hear You whisper through the rain "I'm with you"and as Your mercy falls I raise my hands and praise the God who gives and takes away

I lift my eyes onto the hills where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth I lift my eyes onto the hills where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth